6.28.2010

EMOTICONS: The New Form Rejection

“Due to the high level of submissions we receive on a daily basis, we regret to inform you that we are incapable of sending you as many hugs and kisses as this form rejection might require.”


“OMG YOUR QUERY IS SO AWESOME YOU’RE SO AWESOME WE’D TOTES LOVE TO READ UR MS ZOMG SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE”


“Oh you’re a tricky querier, aren’t you? You thought you could trick us with your fancy coffee cup and bleached white flour and granola bars and long stemmed roses! But your bedazzled query letter can’t fool us! This is DEFINITELY a form rejection!”


“WE ARE LAUGHING FAR TOO HARD TO RESPOND RIGHT NOW!”


“This message has been automatically generated because we are currently on hold with our lawyers. Someone from our legal department will be in touch soon.”
 

43 comments:

Vatche said...

Hilarious post, Tahereh. I especially like the last one. I l.o.l-ed. :P

Write on!

ali said...

OMG freakin' hillarious! :D!

The Alliterative Allomorph said...

LOL. you made me laugh. AGAIN. ;o)

Remilda Graystone said...

This was funny!

Amanda J. said...

OMG! LOL Yes!! Ahaha, love it!

Kristin Miller said...

Awesome. Except when I form reject I also draw from these:

XD Am still laughing to hard to respond properly.

O.o WTF? This sucks. Deal.

o.o Why you gotta hurt me?

Sandy Shin said...

Oh, these emoticons should TOTALLY be employed. SO AWESOME.

Girlinbetween said...

OMG.

This made me laugh so hard!

Jayne said...

Hahaha - can just imagine getting a serious agent letter with 'ZOMG squeeeeeeee' in it!

Clara said...

Lol, loved it!

If I were an agent I'd totally send ZOMg Squeees! Wait, maybe that's why I'm not an agent...lol
Great post!

Christine Danek said...

Way too funny!

Matthew Rush said...

Classic!

Vicki Rocho said...

I'm waiting for you to revolutionize the industry.

Theresa Milstein said...

Oh my goodness, what was that last query all about? Was there stalking involved?

Two nights ago, I received a personalized e-mail rejection, and I so could have used an emoticon.

Adventures in Children's Publishing said...

Lovin' it! Great job, T! Smiley faces convey every emotion a person may need :)

xo

maine character said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
maine character said...

We are incapable of sending you as many hugs and kisses as this most excellent post requires.

MBW aka Olleymae said...

lol this is awesome

:D

salarsenッ said...

Perfect way to brighten my morning. Thanks.

Jaydee Morgan said...

Too cute and very funny :)

Jonathon Arntson said...

*Gigglefest 2010 hath commenced*

Candyland said...

Haha. I WISH I'd get a response of an emoticon.

You should add one with "z's" in the eyes to show "We're so bored with this we didn't get through the first sentence, but it'll make a nice screen saver for when I'm having a hard time falling asleep..."

Meagan Frank said...

These are great...and endless. I like the sleeping emoticon idea....there can be one that is distracted by its iphone...and on and on. Funny stuff!

Caitlin R. O'Connell said...

*chokes on tea at the last one*

You are really TOO funny, Tahereh!

Great translations of emoticons! :D

Clara said...

Oh and PS: I know you probably forgot about my humble exhistence by now, but there's an award for you on my blog. =)

Erica Mitchell-Spickard said...

Way too funny, still laughing and I would be happy to get the ZOMG face someday. :D

Dorothy Dreyer said...

Heehee, that would make it easier for agents ... and probably less painful for many writers, lol.

Krispy said...

LOL. Oh the power of emoticons. Yours are so cute though!

Misty Waters said...

=D> (That's me clapping . . .)
:)) (Laughing)
>:D< (Hugging)

Michelle Hodkin said...

I needed this laugh today:

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

Thank you.

Sumayyah said...

THESE ARE BRILLIANT AND HILARIOUS! <333333 <--that is an ice cream cone of love that I'm handing over to you because you are also brilliant and hilarious.

Lisa Gail Green said...

Yeah, I get that last one a lot. He he he.

Sarah Enni said...

HAHAHA amazing. and, so true.

Peggy said...

Hehehe. That is awesome. I totally hope they start using those!

Shannon O'Donnell said...

Your tub of funny is just bottomless, isn't it?! You rock!! :-)

Marsha Sigman said...

ahhahahhahh.

I would totally be ok with emoticon form rejections.

Christina Lee said...

hahaha too cute!

Angela Ackerman said...

Damn. It was the bleached flour, wasn't it? I KNEW I was trying too hard. Oh well.

Angela @ The Bookshelf Muse

Jemi Fraser said...

:)

Mary McDonald said...

Great post! Love it. hehe.

Stina Lindenblatt said...

Ahahahahahahahahahaha!

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

:-0 That was fun!

Jaleh D said...

Emoticons, for the win!

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